Mizblog

I find that being around other people too long drains my energy, but that being by myself for too long also drains me. I need to flip back and forth regularly to stay in top form. I also enjoy just walking around in a somewhat crowded environment. School was always good for that. I’d find myself in a trance, walking around and just letting the ambient noise numb my consciousness while I thought about this and that. Mostly about girls, as it turns out, but that’s hardly surprising.

So today I’m at home, working on a project that I detest more and more the longer it goes on. I feel like I’m actually killing myself with dumbness as I do this job. The problem is that I can’t think of anything else I’d rather work on. I think I’m burned out and need to recharge. I feel half dead most of the time, and it’s the dead part that feels better than the part that’s alive.

Sangeeta’s having her car repainted this week, so no car for me until Thursday.

Sangeeta’s father is coming to stay with us next month. If I live through that, I’ll be a very surprised person come next year.

I didn’t sleep well at all last night. I can’t remember any dreams but I do remember Sangeeta waking me up over and over because I was snoring.

So now I’m just sitting here, writing all this shit and wondering what the fuck I’m doing with myself anymore.