Calvin’s Dad

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Kiss Hank’s Ass

This is a brilliant analogue to Christian missionary dialogue. It uses many common Christian proselytizing forms but replaces Jesus with Hank. Whereas Jesus wants you to believe that he is the Son of God so that he can give you eternal life, and eternal torture and damnation if you don’t, Hank is a billionaire philanthropist who wants to give you a million dollars if you kiss his ass, and a serious ass kicking if you don’t.

Are you ready to kiss Hank’s ass?

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